soulbeats

          To see the miracle of life unfolding all around me...oh, how truly good God must be to create such a beautiful, vibrant world...to give us such precious gifts of love and abundance. Capturing my view of this amazing world through the lense of a camera brings me great joy.

         When I think about the journey I've traveled thus far and of all the many, many miracles that I have encountered along the way -- miracles with unforgettable faces -- I am filled with so much gratitude, it takes my breath away.

         Soulbeats is my way of saying "Thank you" to every hand that has ever reached out to lift me up when I've been down and to every heart that has opened wide and allowed me to find comfort inside. To every kindred spirit who has stood by my side as I have confronted fears, wept with me as I have mourned, and comforted my weary soul when I have felt defeated and alone...thank you. I am so grateful. To every God-sent angel who gently helps me to see beyond and to rise above my troubles,
I thank you.

         And to every soul who hurts today...who struggles...who mourns...I hope soulbeats offers you a few moments of comfort, peace, tranquility, serenity, hope, and inspiration.

         I appreciate the feedback that I have received regarding soulbeats, and I leave you now with a message that continues to motivate me to keep growing and especially to keep sharing. This "stranger" has no idea how deeply he or she affected me, but I thank him or her from the bottom of my heart. I hope that anyone reading it will take this message to heart as I have and will remember that everything we do, every choice we make or don't make...matters.



Friday, 3/16/01, 9:38 AM

i've been struggling lately, with so many things of great importance to me. i've been working very hard to improve myself and improve my surroundings and improve my life but recently, it's felt like my reward for doing all of this has been the loss of the people i love.. just plain loss. and it pushes me to give up, to fly the white flag and throw in the towel. to stop trying. to accept defeat.. to let go of dreams that i only recently learned how to dream about. last night i closed down my website, one of my most treasured creations, because i had decided that some people are full of worth, and are allowed to dream, they're important and they matter; and some people, like myself, are worthless and should not dream and are not important and do not matter. i decided i should stop trying to be someone i am not and give up my struggle for improvement. stop the therapy, stop the education, stop having a home to come home to every night or meals to eat. i was gonna go back to the streets... last night, i let temptation win and went *home* to heroin. this morning, i came online just to read my last emails and on my home page, my.yahoo.com page there was a post in a club i belong to about a site. being a web designer, it's extremely difficult not to give into the temptation to go see a new site when you find out about it. i came here and i just kept reading all the quotes and looking at all the pictures... but one segment really changed my mind about some things... the segment titled "in touch with the world," really helped me gain an insight into my own life right now and encouraged me to stop this self-destructiveness and continue with the improvements that i've begun in the past year or so. i just wanted to thank you and let you know what this has done for me. never underestimate the power of simplicity, i suppose.

thank you, a stranger